#stolen I, Victor Tatur chemonget ole olduwa phd rtd mjr , being of sound mind and good health….(Wait, ebu nipatie hiyo Bible nibebe ndio hawa watu wajue niko serious) Now let the camera roll again. One, two three…. take two! I, Victor Tatur being of sound mind and good health, 6-time suicide bomber, pastor at Mavuno Church, Sheikh at Masjid Mussa Mosque Mombasa, part-time worshipper at New Ghandi Omshanti Shanti Hindu temple Nairobi, would like to publicly announce that, after intense consultation with the Matter Hospital, Ministry of Health under department of Heart Attack, faculty of football-related Illnesses, Standard Chartered Heart Marathon, FKF, La Liga, Bundesliga, KPL, French Ligue One, FIFA, CAF and EPL, I have officially stopped supporting Manchester United and from now henceforth, as for me and my house, we shall support ARSENAL FC. I also want to demand total compensation from Manchester United for all the beers, njugus, painkillers, soft drinks and internet bundles I’ve spent supporting them both online and offline in bars and social media too. I want to also demand compensation from all ladies, friends, relatives or family members whom, under unclear and rare circumstances, I ended up spending money on them in the name of supporting Manchester United, either in bars, at home, at school, or anywhere else. Lastly, I also want to demand compensation from Manchester United for all the money I’ve spent betting, losing and betting again, not forgetting the jersey’s I’ve bought ever since Paul Scholes was still the most handsome player in England. The Old Trafford management will have to compensate me for the sleepless nights I spent outside watching their pathetic performance during late Champions League matches, and every expense I incurred including taxi na pesa ya kulipa maasai anifikishe kwa gate. Thank you for your time. I am now OFFICIALLY AN ARSENAL FC DIEHARD. SIGNED BY: Victor Tatur 로ㅓㅑㅗㅍㅌㅆ냈 WITNESSED BY: Sepp Blatter, Yoweri Kaguta Museveni, Mavuno Youth Fellowship, CAF, IEBC, IDAC, COMESA, EABL, EPL, LA Liga, French League 1, Bundesliga, LOL, LMFAO, WTF, NKT, FKF, DSTV, OTC, Matter Hospital, Matter Heart Run, Kenya Medical Association of Painkillers, Muthurwa Jersey Hawkers and Bar Owners Association of Kenya.
Posted on: Mon, 17 Mar 2014 18:03:42 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015