A memoir about life with DID. About the author - About Liz Elliot (Currently residing in Southern California) (Has an MFA in Creative Writing and a Bachelors in Education) I guess I should first explain why I have this website, and what I’m trying to do with it. I’m Liz Elliot, and I’ve written my memoir about living with DID because I wanted to share my story with other people so that it might help break down some of the illusions about living with DID. A lot of brave people have done that before me, and I wanted to be a part of making change for people who live with DID like I do. I’m writing the positive life articles for the website because I am living a positive and successful life with DID and I’d like to share that. I’d like to show the uplifting sides of being a multiple, along with the life realities and the feelings of this type of experience. I’ve been integrating my DID for about twelve years, but I’ve been in counseling since I was nineteen years old, off and on. I’m almost forty. My first counselors didn’t quite understand what was wrong with me, but for the last decade or so I’ve worked with an amazing woman who’s really taken care of me and my different selves. It took a long time for me to accept that I actually had DID. I didn’t believe my counselor for the first few years when she would talk about how I would change in front of her in our sessions. After I finally accepted that I had DID, it still took me a while to start really acknowledging my different parts of self, and I have to say that this was not my safest feelings yet in my journey. My life seemed out of control to me, or I was afraid that it would be out of control if I acknowledged that there were other parts of me, but my counselor understood that nothing was different about me and helped me understand that seeing my different selves was not going to change our behaviors. We were still just us. She helped me to understand that I didn’t have anything to worry about, and that I’d lived with these parts of myself for most of my life anyway. Later I learned to give my different parts of self the things that they needed to heal and grow, and to become one with our system as a whole. I’m not fully integrated yet, just mostly integrated. I don’t know if I will ever be fully integrated. I’m not sure if it even matters. I think that what matters the most is that I accept that this unique and special journey was meant to be mine. I’m living an alternative and extraordinarily deep experience in this life, one that lets me see life in a way that most people will not know how to dig deep enough to find. I feel such gratitude in this life for having to look so far into myself, and for having to really learn to know myself. This has all led to my understanding the very essence of my spiritual self. I guess now I feel like DID has been a gift to me. I don’t know how old I was when I first dissociated. My earliest memory in my life is at fourteen months old. I had a major transition at that time into the house of my aunt, where my young mother left me, but I do believe that I must have turned to dissociation before I was fourteen months old. I believe this because of the memory I had at that age. I was so awake in this memory, more awake to my surroundings than I think a small child would be. I don’t think that being that aware and awake at that time was a new experience for me. I was assessing a room from what felt like a mature perspective. The most important thing that I would want to convey about myself would be that I believe in living a positive and evolving spiritual life. I have great spiritual faith. I wish you the best in a positive life! Elliot
Posted on: Sat, 08 Jun 2013 15:17:18 +0000
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