A smidge of updating to do; weve been super busy. Elfy sent us off to Westmead on Saturday for the Christmas party. I was looking forward to taking her so she could go and just have a really positive experience. She run around like a crazy chook, hugged Santa and danced up a storm. Santa heard she likes babies so got her a dolly set with pram and backpack and accessories plus a doctors kit. She was thrilled. She loved the carols and danced for all the sweet little babies.... So little, going through so much - a little beacon of light. We saw some of our regular families who were starting, going through, completing treatment or on maintenance. It was lovely to see so many doing so well, and it was encouraging and confronting to see others battling on, or new faces. By the time we left Dasha was in good spirits but the life felt sapped out of me. Ive cried a lot since then.... I wasnt expecting it to stir up so much horror in me quite frankly. Im praying I shake it off quickly as its a little overwhelming for me right now. Ill know next time to prepare myself a little better. Dasha was pain free all the way down and back and is sleeping really well at night for the first time in more than a year. Surprisingly sleep after being tired for so long is a very very exhausting process. Im more tired now than when I wasnt sleeping but I have to find new non hormone and and renal forms of energy maintenance now - roll on post Christmas diet and exercise plan. Happy birthday Rene, Linke is just beautiful and looks so well! Elfy joined in all the fun times. Dasha is doing well in the lyrica apart from being very off with the fairies flighty and hard to get to if that makes sense. Ive dropped her dose as Im finding it very difficult to connect with her so Im hoping she copes well with the lower dose. Dasha handed out her Christmas decorations with pride and they were received well. Please pray for Dasha - that she never ever has to go through that ever again, and for me as I struggle to manage my fear.... Though in my heart I feel she is so well and strong - its just an irrational kind of fear (I think - unless its normal) that comes up when I go back to westmead. I should have known as when we were making the decorations for each person that supported us, all the individual memories of moments is rather have never lived came flooding back. I guess thats how you say thank you.... You go through these moments to make something special to say thank you for saving your babies life.
Posted on: Sun, 14 Dec 2014 11:48:06 +0000