I DO NOT RECALL EVER MAKING A NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION. Wait, I DID stop eating a delicious dessert mid-pie one year on New Year’s Day. It was an apple pie and I was digging into it like a dog digs a hole. But I actually had the self-mastery to stop mid-pie! Well, to be honest, it was only because I saw the chocolate pecan pie and didn’t know if I had enough room for both. I did though. And some cookies too. I guess that’s SORT of a resolution, isn’t it? I stopped mid-pie for a minute. Not many men can do it, even if they swear they will, ladies. You’ve heard it all before, “No sweetheart, I swear I’ll stop right at the mid-line. I won’t go a centimeter further. Just let me git at the . . .” And then the next thing you know, you’re looking at an empty pie plate and there he is snoring on the couch. Anyway, the reason I am writing this is to let you know about an exciting new product that I will soon be marketing; a Premium Tee-shirt with the motto: “I Stopped Mid-Pie!” emblazoned across it. $99 on my website. If it sells as well as I think it will, I’m also going to offer another one: “Does Anybody Want The Last Roll?” Yesterday when I planned to make a video of my version of Auld Lang Syne, I took a lot of footage of myself lip syncing along in my truck. It’s the easy way to do it when you don’t have someone handy to hold the camera. But then I realized that what the video needed wasn’t more of me, but less of me. That’s a big revelation that I believe transcends videodom to the real world, podnas. But nonetheless, here I am inviting you to sing along and envision sharing kindness with one another and honoring each other for now and for times long past. We are a raggedy lot. Truly we are. We argue over insanely stupid things. So this is my very tiny suggestion, not an order, not some directive I’m cramming down anyone’s throat, just a simple suggestion that you post only kind things this year and see if you notice any difference in your happiness. Are you man enough? Are you woman enough? I think ye are. Happy New Year to you. ~ Michael Tomlinson Concerts, CDs, Downloads & Events at michaeltomlinson
Posted on: Thu, 01 Jan 2015 15:00:36 +0000
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