I usually try to keep my fb posts fun and easy going, I generally save the venting for my hubby. But this is something that has been bothering me for a while. I see women silently suffering in pain through infertility and miscarriage. A lot of us who have never experienced these things first hand dont realize we may be saying harmful things to these folks. I myself am guilty of pestering people asking them when they will have kids, not knowing theyve been trying for years unsuccessfully and me asking just brings up more pain to the anguish they are already experiencing. Or when I found out someone miscarried, I always thought it was because they did something wrong to cause it. Because people rarely talk about infertility and miscarriage, most who havent been there are uneducated and can be very insensitive to those going through possibly the most painful time of their life. When a woman loses the baby shes been caring for in her womb, even if it was a short time, it is devastating. The longer shes been carrying it is even more devastating. And while shes suffering this loss, no one wants to talk to her or acknowledge her loss because its such an uncomfortable subject. I know I have a really hard time knowing what to say to people when I have no idea what its like to be in their shoes. The best thing to say is Im so sorry for your loss, you dont have to try to say something to make them feel better, only time can do that. Just let them feel like its ok to talk about and that youre there for them. It is an emotional time and may be difficult for women to discuss in person so the best thing to do is send a nice text or card just so they know you care, and check in with them every once in a while to make sure theyre ok, even if they appear to be fine. Miscarriage is VERY common, most of the time Drs dont know why it happened. Since many women have been through this and may go through this in the future, we need to be educated so we dont cause more harm and that we can lend proper support. Yes, I have had a miscarriage. No, it was NOT my dancing that caused it, Ive danced through 2 of my successful pregnancies. And even though my Dr. told me I could continue as I danced before I was pregnant, I still cut back 50%, stayed hydrated, watched my temp and did everything I was supposed to. We all want reasons for why these terrible things happen, but most of the time will find no reason. I personally just tell myself to trust in Gods plan. I know Im putting myself out there to discuss this in public, but I dont even care anymore. Im tired of seeing women suffering in silence and if I can help a few ladies with this post then I will feel like I did something. There is no shame in infertility or miscarriage/stillbirth. Women should not be made to feel guilty, and people shouldnt be afraid to talk about this. It is part of life, we need to accept it and be more compassionate towards others. Ok Im done, thank you for listening. Feel free to share.
Posted on: Mon, 04 Aug 2014 22:55:51 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015