Im still studying in secondary school and im a closeted gay. I have this huge crush on this friend of mine and he is actually my best friend. I have liked him for about 2 years and my crush on him is never seeming to fade. He is definitely straight and we hang out alot. I have always wanted to tell him that i love him but i know that if i do that everything will change beacuse he said that he would be awkward and not talk to anyone gay as he says he is afraid of them liking him. And it is pretty clear that he just looks at me as a friend and nothing more. It really hurts for me all the time as we always hang out and as i look at his cute smile and hair and everything i just fall more for him with the knowledge that we will never cease to happen. Everytime i see him i just want o hug and kiss him and scream I LOVE YOU !! And us never happening is just killing me so much that i just cry myself to sleep like on nights. I try to listen to music and stuffs to be distracted from my thoughts. I know i should be focusing on my studies now and not let such things affect me but ya life is just working like that for me -.- But no matter what i will always look at him and admire him and fantasize about him being in a relationship with him from afar :) Just felt like saying .Its a boring storyyy but oh wellz.
Posted on: Wed, 12 Nov 2014 02:05:23 +0000
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