It takes a lot for a person to admit their faults or short comings, bad choices or mistakes, and then do the work necessary to correct their errors, improve themselves to become better people, or humble themselves to seek forgiveness or redemption from the ones they love or may have offended. Understand this, if someone has hurt you because of their mistake or bad choices or even their selfishness, it is absolutely YOUR CHOICE to either forgive them or to not be bothered with them,... BUT WHICHEVER ONE YOU CHOOSE, COMMIT TO IT FULLY! If you dont want to be bothered, simply cut them off and be done with it. But if you are a REALIST, and you are capable of recognizing the fact that they made a mistake, and have been doing everything within their power to make amends, do not undermine their commitment to your love and respect by continually throwing the past up in their face. True story: A man and woman take a break from their 5 year relationship that lasted only 30 days. (Already you know this is nonsense. There is no such thing as a break from a relationship. Either you are in one or you are not.) They both date other people. They both were intimate with other people. But neither had revealed any info about what the other had been doing or who with for the 2 months that they had been working on rebuilding their relationship. And for those 2 months, all was well. By chance, the woman discovered who the other woman was that her lover had been seeing. The other woman was extremely attractive and was more than just a little smitten with the man. She pursued him. The man openly told the other woman NO because he was going to work out his relationship with his woman. His woman on the other hand had become extremely jealous and began to question him on the time hed spent with this other woman. It turned into arguments, which evolved into fights, that eventuated into her telling him that he had to go. For the next 3 months, this man did everything within his power to win her ;back. They had a 5 year relationship that he did not want to see die, but she would not let it go. Instead, she decided to use this opportunity to tell him everything that she hated about him. She did more than just break his heart, she wounded his pride and destroyed his hope. Guess who was there to help him get it back again? - Yep. The other woman whom he had rejected because he had taken a stand and made it up in his mind to do right by his woman. Now heres the kicker. Even though he was hurt by all of the mean spirited things that his ex had said to him, the truth of the matter is that he still had great love and respect for her. So instead of ignoring her words, he took everything that she had said to him to heart, and began doing everything that he could to correct those issues that she had hurled at him in the form of insults. He took her words and his hurt and made himself a better man. The sad part about it is that he was doing it to be a better man for a woman who would never love him again the way he needed to be loved. So by default, the new and improved him gets bequeathed to the other woman. His ex is feeling spiteful. She dates some of his friends. She ignores his calls. She disgraces him to friends and family. And he wont defend himself against her words because all he wants is peace between them. After 6 months of her raging, she realizes that she misses him. She has had 10 different possibles but none of them even come close to what she needs to be comfortable or happy in a relationship. She spots her ex, she notices the changes that hes made. She secretly smiles to herself knowing that he made those changes because of her words, but wont acknowledge him. She continues to ignore him until she simply cant anymore. She has been lonely on the inside and just wants her life back. She wants what they had built together, back. She wants her man back again. BUT NOW HES ENGAGED TO BE MARRIED TO THE OTHER WOMAN WHO HAS HELPED HIM PICK BACK UP THE PIECES OF HIS BROKEN HEART. AND NOW HE IS THE ONE IGNORING HER CALLS AND PLEAS. The point here is this: RELATIONSHIPS TAKE TIME AND WORK. AND DURING THAT TIME IT TAKES TO GET THINGS RIGHT, YOU BOTH ARE GOING TO MAKE SOME SERIOUS MISTAKES. BUT IF YOU SINCERELY LOVE EACH OTHER YOU CAN WORK THROUGH THOSE MISTAKES AND CONTINUE TO GROW TOGETHER AS A COUPLE, THAT CAN HAVE A LOVING RELATIONSHIP THAT CREATES MEMORIES FOR YOU BOTH FOR DECADES AND GENERATIONS TO COME. DONT BE SO QUICK TO GIVE THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE AWAY TO SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE YOU ARE IN A MOOD, OR BECAUSE OF YOUR PRIDE OR EGO. YOUR LOVE FOR EACH OTHER IS SHAPING YOU BOTH INTO THE PERFECT PERSON FOR EACH OTHER. TRUE BITTERNESS COMES WHEN YOU SEE ALL OF YOUR HARD WORK BEING ENJOYED BY SOMEONE OTHER THAN YOURSELF. DONT PUT YOURSELF IN A POSITION TO BECOME A BITTER PERSON. Love is worth the work. Its worth fighting for. Its worth the sacrifice, the hurt and the tears. A moment of pain for a lifetime of love. No, I am not saying that you should be anyones fool. I am just saying; PLEASE DO NOT PRETEND THAT PEOPLE DO NOT MAKE MISTAKES OR BAD CHOICES. BE REAL WITH YOURSELF AND EACH OTHER AND THINK TWICE BEFORE DISSOLVING A RELATIONSHIP THAT HAS BROUGHT YOU YEARS OF LOVE, JOY AND CONTENTMENT. IF THE GOOD GREATLY OUTWEIGHS THE BAD, CHECK YOUR ATTITUDE AT THE DOOR AND GET SOME COUNSELING OR HELP. BUT DONT JUST THROW YOUR LIFE AWAY. - Adrian Milan #SomeBodyHadToSayIt THE ADRIAN MILAN FEEL GOOD SONG OF THE DAY IS: Shaliek THE PAST youtu.be/ROW1M2xaVTk
Posted on: Sun, 26 Oct 2014 15:10:15 +0000
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