Just one of those days where I feel like Im melting into reality itself... URGH. Walking, standing, crouching, sitting, lying down, its all too much! It hurts so intensely that I feel drained of life force, and working the mechanics of my body is an act of absolute soul wrenching devotion. I suppose feeling as if the body is burning on fire would be enough to melt anyone! I did go for a walk in the woods though, and enjoyed some sunshine, yet days like today challenge every idea of my existence. Ive been learning to surrender to the experience; not in the sense of giving up to die, in the sense of not creating tension by refusing to react with behaviours that do not create solutions, stopping from acting out of desperation, and allowing the moment to happen as is. It doesnt take away the difficult feelings my body goes through, yet it allows me a sense of momentary peace in being where I am, in the physical form I am currently expressing, in the conscious existence that I am choosing to define with an empowering interpretation instead of reacting to a presumption or judgement. And now I meeeeeeeeeelt away for the evening...
Posted on: Mon, 24 Mar 2014 21:41:02 +0000