Okay, this is not my finest hour. Have you ever had a situation when you wish the ground would swallow you up? I just have. Not my first, but certainly one of the worst. My house is old—built in the fifties—and for some inexplicable reason the bathroom window which frames the tub also looks out on the front porch. I usually keep the blinds closed, but it was so beautiful and sunny this morning...and nature called. There I was midway through a tinkle when a man appeared in the window. He was talking with another man, both from a religious order going door-to-door, no doubt to weed out the Saturday sinners. And there I am literally with my pants down. What to do? I cant slide the shower door closed so they wont see me because they might hear it and gaze in the window at the now spectacular view on the other side of the tub. My very large dogs are barking and snarling their heads off at the front door and these gentlemen are debating the merits of one of them slipping his hand through my mailbox in the door to drop a pamphlet. They decide it isnt a great idea because they risked losing a hand - a wise move. Besides which, I have a little sign by the door which clearly says no solicitation. So, what do they do? They decide to keep ringing the doorbell so they can place the pamphlet in my hot little hands. I guess my car in the driveway gave me away. And I imagine most folks hide inside and pretend they arent home. Dang! I cant move from my perch because Im dressed in neon red shorts and a tee. The slightest shift on my part and theyll spot me for sure. I cant make a sound because heads will swivel in my direction. The dogs have now worked themselves into a frenzy and Im still sitting in full view on the throne. Im telling you, it was the longest five minutes of my life before they gave up and left the porch. Note to self...keep the dang blinds closed! Care to share one of your embarrassing moments?
Posted on: Sat, 28 Jun 2014 14:03:55 +0000
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