So...THIS is what it sounds like when doves cry... read on, baby birds... Last night I met a fellow Closet Candy Crusher. This CCC-er is on level 350, and has NEVER PURCHASED A BOOSTER. I am on level 109 and have never purchased a booster, but the hopelessness has, in earnest, begun to creep in... Must I abort Candy Crush forever? Admit defeat and move on to... Pet Rescue? NOOOOO!!!! This meeting.... was my destiny. Indeed, there is no way I could justify purchasing a booster. Srsly, Certainly, that 1 or 2 bucks you just desperately spent on a virtual school of Swedish Fish could be put to SOME greater use in this world, no? Now, add it up. Perhaps you have only done it just the once. Maybe, just the once, out of an agitation and frustration so severe it seemed the only way out... THIS... is the gateway booster. And you MUST remain strong. CONSTANT VIGILANCE!!! The millions of dollars that have been sunk into Candy Crush boosters could have provided a miracle treatment or shelter for MANY suffering children and/or animals.... OR purchased several very, VERY, nice handbags.... I personally know several people who have spent enough money on boosters to neuter a village of stray cats. And, more to the point - with all due respect to all you booster purchasers out there... you are freaking CHEATERS. ;) CHEAT. ERS. CHEATER CHEATER PUMPKIN EATERS!!! BUT.... my empathy persists, deep beneath the SEETHING disillusionment. For you, my beloved, are at the mercy of your delusions. And you need HELP. Which is why I have started CCCA: Closet Candy Crushers Anonymous. We are a supportive community of 2 that is RAPIDLY growing... And may I, in conclusion, remind you ALL... that my new CCCA friend has MADE IT TO LEVEL 350 without EVER purchasing a booster of ANY KIND. (Or shes a liar. Im not sure. I just met her. Dont judge me.) In the honorably attested spirit of (CCCA), I will not reveal the identity of this gifted soul, but shall thusly hereto-fourth refer to her as The Wind Beneath My Wings, and The Wind Beneath My Wings alone. #crushperation
Posted on: Sun, 30 Mar 2014 23:20:52 +0000
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