Used to live five miles from Nottingham. Never experienced a place with more trogladytic, violent people. Not in LA, New York, London, Manchester, anywhere. It’s not called ‘Shottingham’ for nothing. Typical Nottingham Saturday: Early afternoon: watch old woman fighting with tramp outside Broadmarsh. The air is full of promise, and the smell of wee. Early evening: watch group of people dressed as Wayne Rooney attack group of people dressed as Russel Brand, but they can’t keep up when the fops run away, due to their excessive Greggs consumption. The night is young. Late evening: love is a beautiful thing. That’s why a twenty stone woman in a size eight dress is knocking her boyfriend’s head against a kebab shop window. Do not worry, this is merely foreplay. Midnight: city centre is covered in s**t, goats and cattle wander by, fire glows on the horizon. Only suffered two threats of glassing this evening. Catch taxi home.
Posted on: Sat, 27 Jul 2013 00:18:56 +0000
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