man tomorrow i have a doctors appointment with my regular doctor , then in the afternoon i have surgery on my wisdom teeth ugh!. busy day. then i have all this family coming & going and my parents here from sac. just stressful the only person who understood how im feeling is my grandma.i tell HER EVERYTHING ! just annoying but im glad their there for my grandma & for me just sucks cause i dont want no help from no one besides my grandma, this to shall pass and everyone will go home when things get settled in and i gotta find some comfort in the new changes . cant change people but i can change myself & just have boundaries with people. i just miss my grandma so muchhhhhhh she was back up in everything.just experiencing alot of old feelings old resentments skipped the old ideas. lol at this point even the people i see drinking or smoking just makes my tummy turn , your just killing yourself & then next ill be at their bedside. we need to get it together , lord knows i am. my pastors have been so supportive and my NA family but most of all my grandpa. i just feel really protective of him i dont want no one else hurting him cause hes already been through so much.if all goes well she will be transferred to a long term facility , once she is strong enough to be moved for the hospital. where all here temporary & we got to appreciate what we have & let go of the negative wether its people places or things or just bagged and move on to a greater positive living. spent alot of time alone house super quiet just like i like it "grandma would be on her way home right now from the center " so many memories just really really appreciating the time i still have with her. keep praying for her & my family and me.
Posted on: Fri, 20 Sep 2013 04:19:19 +0000
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