As a United States Military Veteran, I frequently have people say, thank you for your service to me. Though I greatly appreciate the sentiment, it still sits uneasily on me. Some of you reading this now may be one of those people. I try very hard to except your kind-hearted compliment with grace and dignity, but I feel as though I fail every time. You see... The proper response is to say, Youre welcome. But to say that makes me feel as if I am being self-righteous and arrogant; and for those of you that know me, I detest both self-righteousness and arrogance. Though the general public often sees us Military types as both of those things, and even us as them in a justified manner, we are really not so; generally speaking. Deep down inside there is a natural humbleness to the way we see ourselves. We know that each of us are just one small piece in a much larger machine. Without our fellow men and women in uniform, we are nothing. We can do nothing alone. An individual cannot create the effect that we all work so hard to create; safety and security for our fellow Americans. So if we say, youre welcome, then we feel as if we are taking the sole credit for something that is due to many, many others that are still in uniform, those that we served with, and those that came before us over the last 200 plus years. Then there is the cliché effect that is kicking in, full force now. We all hear it so often, that it has become empty. You thank us, but then go on your merry way. As if you have fulfilled your duty, so now we dont matter anymore. There is no longer any true meaning behind what you just said to one of us. And the thought does cross our minds from time to time... Do you even know what it is you are thanking us for? Do you understand that you are putting someone on the spot that made a life out of being part of a family that though it may be extremely dysfunctional at times? It is a family that cannot see ourselves as individuals. Rather, we see ourselves as a part of something much bigger. Civilians believe that we are conditioned (or brainwashed) into believing that we have no individuality while serving in the military. This cannot be further from the truth. Often, it is our individuality that makes our military strong. But we must be able to work efficiently and cohesively together in order to succeed at what we do. So we learn to speak the same language. We learn to perform in the same manner. We learn to think alike. This is not our individuality being stripped away. It is a common thread that binds our individual personalities together in such a way that makes us a strong and effective single unit. This commonality is a safe haven for us. It is a protection that keeps us alive. And when we get out, and are on our own, insecurity creeps up within each of us and causes us to feel unstable. We are no longer surrounded by people that know how I think. We do not have the confidence of knowing that the next person over performs the job we share in the same way that we were taught. But we adapt the best we can and keep moving forward; most of the time. So when you say thank you to a Veteran, all of this comes screaming back up in our faces. We often suddenly become insecure. We dont want to say, youre welcome. Not because we are being disrespectful. Rather, we feel like saying so disrespects so many of our fellow men and women that also put a uniform on and did the same things that we did. And many of them never came home. Then you add in the hollowness of the compliment, and we are at a loss in how to respond despite the fact that this dilemma faces us nearly on a daily basis. It just never seems to resolve itself. We never figure out how to reply unless we give up our humble nature; one of the last few comforts we have left to ourselves that we gained from our time in service. Personally, I would rather you not say it at all to me. But if you feel compelled to do so anyway, read the following article. Put meaning back into what you are saying. I have this deep seeded feeling that this is one of the most important articles of modern day society even though, as of the time I am writing this post, I only first read it a few minutes ago. revoltdaily.org/stop-thanking-veterans-for-their-service/
Posted on: Thu, 07 Aug 2014 05:07:44 +0000