Brand New Letter!! Glad it arrived before the snow and ice :) Dear Daughter, Well, Grand Pappys old mule finally gave out. She wont plow a lick. When they say stubborn as a mule this is the one theys talkin about. He has tried to plow the field hisself by hand but hes gettin on in years, dont ya know. Granny wrote her brother who was recently incarcerated in the state pen. He didnt do anything wrong according to Granny. He jest was gettin a little peeved at the bank and asked the teller did she have a stick up, well thats as far as he got. She commenced to hollarin that the bank was being robbed. Anyhoo, Granny mentioned to him that they was plowin that hard field by hand. He wrote her back a letter that said Do not plow that field!!!! Thats where I buried the bodies!! Next thing you knows, the field is full of big black cars and men wearin FBI jackets. They dug that field up one side and down the other. Course, they didnt find a thing and apologized for the mess and left. Granny wrote her brother back and told him what happened. He answered It was the best I could do for ya under my circumstances. Grand Pappy says there should be a bumper crop this year. Do you remember Scarlet Lee Hopstedder? I was at a ladies axillary meetin at church when she come waltzin in. You could have knocked me over with a feather. She looked like a new person. Seems her niece, Lulabelle, just opened up a beauty parlour over Nelson way. Its called Lulabelles House of Beauty and Car Wash. Now I know what youre thinkin. Lulabelles not known for her own beauty but I swear, anyone who can make Scarlet Lee look good is alright by me. Scarlet Lee handed out some coupons for 20% off of a stylin. Well, I am here to tell you, I took her up on it. I went home and dug through our pictures and found one of me I really liked. It was taken back in 85 but I always liked how I looked back then. It was that picture of me and our Irish Setter, Rosie. I know you know which one, I showed it to you. It was in full color too, not that old black and white stuff. I took that picture straight to Lulabelle and handed it to her. I wants to look jest like that! I says. Well, I guess I do. My hair is long, a tad wavy and red. Lulabelle was never the sharpest crayon in the box. It could be worse I guess. Rosie was a good lookin dog. Your Daddy looked at me and said he didnt know whether to hug me or throw a stick for me to fetch. Now you know I aint one to gossip but I just got back from visitin Joleen and Zero. I swear that girl is in the family way again. She looks like she done swallowed a watermelon seed. It happened right about the same time the state upped the welfare for kids. Im jest sayin thats a mighty co-incidence if you ask me and no one did. I wish you was here to see my flower gardens this year. I have all kinds but I got to admit my favorite is those jasmine vines I planted against the outhouse. They solve a big problem, let me tell you, and in exchange they get a lot of fertilizer. Well, thats about all from here. Ill write you after the Melon Festival. They are havin a traveling show come in for it. I hope its not the one I used to run with. Your Daddy gets mighty jealous; especially now that I look as good as old Rosie. Love, Mama
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 15:34:52 +0000
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