CHECK THE CHEQUE CONFESSIONS ON THE WEEKEND FOLLOWING ALL SAINTS’ DAY Mr. Manners abhors any bombshells in the Senate. This being the weekend following All Saints’ Day, he eschews the metaphors of warfare and prefers instead the more comforting ecclesiastic ones of the church to describe those of ministerial rank swapping the witty repartee of epic proportions that has become the staple of their public lives. Senator Duffy has been able to impress his listeners with those large figures of $13,500 and $90,000. Those aren’t just count the lay-people in front of you variety numbers. They are indeed worthy of bottom-line position in any ledger sheet, the kind of reconcilation that would put a smile on any data keeper worth his salt or the parish priest or pastor that realizes that the needs of the flock, thank good providence, have been taken care of for the foreseeable future. Mr. Manners prevails upon his gentle readers to allow him to make his confession about Government of Canada issue cheques which are in his possession. The highly coveted five-digit numbers which inspire Senator Duffy’s story do not adorn the instruments of payment of his entitlement. The rather small amounts do nonetheless allow for the telling of what Mr. Manners believes to be a worthy urban legend of our days. What can be said for two Government of Canada cheques payable to the order of Mr. Manners as of November 3, 2008 in the amounts of $18.70 and $17.93 issued while he lived in a foreign land? These are amounts of a GST refund for which he was entitled to file a claim following an adventure for fine Canadian-bought merchandise during one of the returns from his sixteen-year sojourn in the Far East. Ladies and gentlemen, if you scrutinize the grand total, you will wonder why only one cheque was not issued for the extremely modest bottom line of $36.63. Mr. Manners did eventually make that request to the GST office in Summerside PEI, only about 40 km away from Cavendish, the “designation” for Senator Duffy’s representation according to the Senate webpage, following Mr. Manners’ attempt to cash the original refund at his Citibank in Sapporo. Now the original refund had been issued as a convenience to a resident in Japan in yen. However, the Citibank clerks were preparing to dock a commission of 600 yen (an amount equivalent to $6 to $7.50 depending on the rate of exchange). Mr. Manners on that occasion protested that the bank would dock as a commission somewhere between 16% and 20% for such a small return particularly considering the time spent on the documentation required to apply for the refund in the first place. Mr. Manners wishes to confess as well about this occasion that he never enjoyed an overly lavish income abroad and was given to the adage about a penny saved. The refund could wait until he wrote to the GST office in Summerside, which could re-issue the amount in Canadian funds. Now low and behold, Gentle Readers, the GST Summerside office did comply with this request, but must have returned to the original file of Mr. Manner’s receipts to determine the two amounts of $18.70 and $17.93 for surely there must have been TWO purchases for TWO returns. Mr. Manners’ good luck luck did not run out there, ladies and gentlemen, mesdames, messieurs, for only a few days after the arrival of the first pair of cheques arrived—each one discharged in its own envelope—did a second pair of cheques arrive of exactly the same amounts. Coincidence, gentle readers? Mr. Manners thinks not. Those diligent clerks in the GST Summerside office may have their reasons for twice obliging Mr. Manner’s request, but the confusion of receiving a total of FOUR cheques was enough for Mr. Manners to file his Government of Canada issue cheques for an occasion such as this. The prospect of writing another carefully worded letter of explanation to the helpful clerks in the GST Summerside office requires the reflection of the great gift of time when one has much less to do. The Prime Minister and his conservative party have been meeting in Calgary on the weekend of All Saints. Gentle readers, do you not have stories of having received duplicate copies of Government of Canada issue cheques? Mr. Manners is wont to call such a story one of his confessions; perhaps gentle readers would have another name for such an episode. cbc.ca/news/politics/mike-duffy-drops-another-bombshell-there-were-2-cheques-1.2254419 radio-canada.ca/nouvelles/Politique/2013/10/28/001-senat-conservateur-carignan-motions-sanctions.shtml
Posted on: Mon, 04 Nov 2013 01:09:17 +0000
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