Convenience Fees? This has bugged me for quite a while now. In the old days, one paid a bill by writing a check, sticking it into the provided envelope, affixing a stamp, and dropping it into a mail box. Hoo-wee, what a daunting task! And the cost? The price of a stamp. In the same old days, a paid, uniformed representative of the US Postal Service would drive to the mailbox, gather the letters, and drive them to the post office, where other paid, uniformed employees would sort the letters, load them into a truck, and yet another paid postal employee would drive the truck to the airport, where paid employees would load them onto planes, and a paid crews would fly the planes to a various airports throughout the country, where paid postal employees would pick up the letters, and drive them to the post office, where paid employees would sort them for other paid employees to deliver them to their recipients in thoughtfully-provided USPS vehicles. The paid employees of the creditors would then open the envelopes, remove the checks, credit the payments to the proper accounts, and then gather the checks for another paid employee to deliver to the bank, where smiling tellers would then deposit said checks into the companys account, where they would wait for an armed representative to arrive in an armored car, accept the bags of checks, and drive them to the banks headquarters. Nowadays, however, we have the internet. The internet allows a customer to pay his or her bills by simply logging on to their account, typing in the payment information, and hitting enter. The payment would instantaneously be transferred via the miracle of digital technology from the customers bank account to the creditors account. The customer would, of course, then be charged an average of $6.95 as a convenience fee. Now, hang on just a moment. The old way cost me the price of a stamp, but the New Way costs me nearly seven bucks! What, pray tell, the hell is up with that? The old way required the considerable collective time of countless employees, gasoline, diesel and jet fuel, and only cost me A STAMP! The new way, which ELIMINATES all those employees, the time, the fuel, and the exhaust from a fleet of vehicles COSTS ME SEVEN BUCKS! Pardon me, money-grabbing corporate swine, but is it not a hell of a lot more convenient FOR YOU that the transaction was handled by computers than it was FOR ME? So, why the fark do you charge ME a convenience fee? For cryin out loud (precisely as I am doing at the moment), why shouldnt YOU pay ME a fee for making YOUR job easier and saving YOU money? Yeah! You greedy bastards should give ME the option of spending the cost of a whole POSTAGE STAMP (currently a whopping .49¢) to pay my bill, or knock SEVEN BUCKS off my bill for making it MORE CONVENIENT for you! Im SAVING you money, and youre PUNISHING me for it with a convenience fee! Well, I have made my decision, Mr Greedy Corporate Bastard. I shall no longer pay a convenience fee by paying my bills online. Nor shall I write and mail a check. For I have decided, after much consideration, that in the future, it will be far more convenient for me to pay my monthly bills by sending you - a big box of pennies. Hope you enjoy the convenience.
Posted on: Sat, 26 Jul 2014 23:48:38 +0000
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