Dear Oscar, The first time I saw you, I didnt even recognize that you were a kitten. Siege was pointing at your direction but I couldnt tell where the mewing was coming from. You were small and filthy, barely a week old. I was aghast coz your mouth was filled with black gunk and you were so dirty and stained we couldnt even tell what your color was. How you managed to find your way at the mall parking lot, I cant even say. I breaks my heart just thinking about it, you, all alone, scared, hungry and cold, dragging yourself and trying to eat everything in your hunger, crying for your mom until we found you. It makes me hate the world a little, because a beautiful soul such as yours didnt deserve the cruelty and ugliness it has put you through. Every day that you gave us was precious. Every day you surprised us with your strength. Every day I wake up and wonder if that is the day you give up on us. By all accounts, you shouldnt even have survived the day at the parking lot. Your temperature was way below normal, you were dehydrated beyond anything weve ever seen, you ate things that your barely developed stomach shouldnt have been able to hande. Physically, you were weak and dying. But you didnt give up. Sometimes I feel like you are being kept alive by your sheer will to survive. You are the strongest soul I have ever seen. Alas, life has never been fair. Today, despite the strength of your spirit, your little body has finally given up. If theres any consolation, at least you passed away in your sleep, not in throes of pain. I cannot lie. I am very angry. I am angry at the world for it has robbed you of a life you so strongly deserve. I am angry that fate didnt let us meet before things had gone so badly for you. I am angry at the people who had ignored your plight, and caused you so much suffering, whether directly or indirectly. I am angry at this society who view your life lesser than theirs, that they let you be born in a world where there was no love readily given the moment you took your first breath. And I am angry at myself for not being enough to save you in the end, that I could not produce the miracle you needed, that I was limited by own shortcomings. We both did our best, but in the end, it had not been enough. I am sorry. Wherever you are now, at least theres no pain, and hunger and cold. I pray that your brave little soul will find peace. I hope that when my time comes, we will meet again, and I can finally see you happy and whole. Rest well Oscar. Thank you for giving us the chance to be with you even for just a little while. We love you, goodnight.
Posted on: Thu, 15 Jan 2015 06:28:51 +0000
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