Good Morning! Today, Im sharing my story. Nervous but excited! Wishing you all an inspiring week ahead! Love, Pearlyn ---------- I always felt deep down that I was unconventional, a free spirit, especially when I was a youth. I enjoyed the arts, got involved in theatre from a young age, rocked out at gigs, and studied theatre and visual arts in Melbourne University. After graduation, which was about 10 years ago, I remember declaring, that I wanted a job that was fun. I started freelancing, and worked in different production jobs for television and theatre (which took me to dozens of cities across the world from Tokyo to Chicago), worked in advertising, and even took on some acting jobs. While I didn’t earn much in comparison to some of my peers in banking or sales, I had an exciting life, more than enough to live well, save money, and even travelled to South Africa during those ‘wilderness years’. I lived in wide-eyed wonder. Yes, there were a few times that I would worry about my next job, but I also savoured the adrenalin of an unexpected open door, and I remember feeling grateful for all the opportunities and people that came my way (especially for meeting my husband). I enjoyed this life of adventure and travel for 2 and a half years, but finally bowed to family and societal pressure to get a ‘real job’. After a short stint in events & sales, I landed, what was to me, dream jobs working at prominent arts organisations in SIngapore. I had a great time working with artists from all over the world, met awesome people, helped to produce art for exhibitions and performances, curated programmes and even got married along the way. Those jobs gave me great life experiences, and helped converge what I was good at with my interests. While I enjoyed my job on the whole, I was also exhausted after 8 years from long hours, a heavy load of admin processes, and not feeling fully aligned to or fully empowered in the work anymore. I had been feeling less and less of myself, and somehow unhappy though my logical mind told me there was no reason to. I was conflicted between feelings of guilt (of feeling unsatisfied even though I loved parts of my job), hope (that I could have something even better) and fear (of stepping out of my comfort zone). My hope was fueled as I was surrounded by friends and artists who would tell me amazing stories or experiences of their work or travel and it made me hungry for something more in my own life. I knew I wasn’t maximising my fullest potential in life, but I knew that I wanted to, and needed to do something about it urgently. Serendipitously, I chanced upon a course that a friend recommended, and it has been the best money I ever spent on myself because it taught me ideas and tools to set me on a life-changing path, one that I could see new possibilities for myself. This is where my Firestarter story begins. I realised that I had lost touch with myself and that I suppressed my feelings and inner voice a lot. But I also learnt that things don’t have to remain the same and I had the power to choose what I want. I realised that I had a massive amount of fear about stepping out of my comfort zone and into the unknown, and that fear grew with me over the years, as I had more and more to ‘lose’. But I learnt that I could create any result that I really wanted. I learnt that I really want to travel, to see beautiful sights around the world with my husband, and to create beauty. So I knew I had to change something about my work and life to create more freedom, time and happiness for myself, to be true to the part of me that is a free spirit. I accepted that it was OK to want something different even though what I had was good, and wanting something else doesn’t make my past efforts any less meaningful or valuable -- I was just ready for a new season in my life. I finally found the guts to quit my job of steady income and CPF (despite just putting a downpayment for a flat), and to venture into the unknown, with a leap of faith, as an independent creative arts consultant and producer. Handing in my resignation letter was hard because there was much I loved about the company and it was tough letting go of that and to finally say goodbye. Fast forward to 1 month later - I wake up happy and well rested, I have a spring in my step and my friends notice I’m ‘lighter’. I feel a sense of relief. I read books over a cup of tea and feel civilised again. I’ve finally gone on an overnight train trip with my husband, from Bangkok to Penang, which we thoroughly enjoyed. It seems like a simple enough thing, but this last trip meant so much to me because it signalled a fresh start and reaffirmed our desire for travelling the world. I started volunteering for some causes- a society for rare disorders, weekly visits to an elderly lady’s home in my neighbourhood to clean her house, a community arts training program, a human rights organisation, etc. This helped rejuvenate me and made me feel more alive. I was reminded that I did have other interests and that I was a multi-dimensional person who was more than my job. I start out with the mindset of wanting to give, but I always get back so much more. Acknowledgement and appreciation, for starters, but also, getting to know more people in my neighbourhood, and on a deeper level, feeling purposeful and inspired. A friend I got to know is a parent of a child with a rare disorder, Pompe Disease, and their family’s story is one that encourages my heart - there is not only unconditional love, but great courage and commitment in their daily fight for Life. It helps me put my own life and priorities in perspective, and always, reminds me of the preciousness and dignity of Life, and that it is up to me to make my life count. Volunteering is one of the most immediate ways in which you can see that you matter and that you do make a difference to people -- all you need is to be open, and available. There’s an internet meme that says “Become friends with people who aren’t your age. Hang out with people whose first language isn’t the same as yours. Get to know someone who doesn’t come from your social class. This is how you see the world. This is how you grow.” Amazing things happen when you trust and let yourself be open - I have received a number of job offers on a freelance basis, too many that I couldn’t take up all of them. I now choose to focus on work that will make a bigger impact in my field or that helps me to grow or challenge myself. Yes, starting my new business is not easy, there are some sacrifices to be made, and I have to learn a lot of new things, but I feel I am growing. I’ve dreamed up a few other big visions for my life, and those have become the sources of my motivation. I don’t know how I’m going to get there, but I think I’ll know what to do when I have the courage to listen to what’s deep in my heart. This journey is about me finding the answers to ‘What is possible?’ It’s about finding my voice again, and making it heard. Its about creating loving and meaningful relationships with family and friends, which I can only do by taking care of myself first. It’s about creating the unique things that I alone can leave behind in this world for others. It’s about starting fires. A new day is a new choice, a choice to live a life that is authentic and brave, and to create my own rules for life. This is a journey I would like to invite you to join me on. So, what’s your story? #thefirestarters Pearlyn
Posted on: Mon, 17 Nov 2014 02:02:14 +0000
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