How to dance with the cat when tired and therefore vulnerable: 1) Wave your hand furiously to designate the fact that you dont want them in the room. Cat makes you burn 40 calories for each step she retreats. When cat disappears, wait. 4...3...2...1... Wave one more time as she peeks round the corner. You mean it, by God. 2) Grab anything of the right shape and size to throw. 5...4..3..2.. crap, she got the jump on me. Hit the cat with the whatever anyway, because I have a lot of cats and Im a dead shot with a size 9 tennis shoe. We dance this dance a lot. 3) Yell furiously as the cat summons her brother, and the two both get by you because you only have one shoe left and youre out of ammo, tired, pissed and just ready to give up. Hiss at them. Not one of my finer moments, but satisfying nonetheless. 4) Get the laser light to make them run out. Run them into the wall a time or two for good measure, because cats are stupid and will die to try to catch the red dot.
Posted on: Tue, 23 Dec 2014 23:41:19 +0000
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