I have to touch on this since all of social media is buzzing right now. If you are one of those people who live by the suicide is selfish opinion, let me explain the situation in the best way I can. You do not know demons, like others do. You do not know the struggle some people go through in order to have a semi-tolerable day. Well, I work hard too. I have bad days too. Ive had depression before, and took meds... but you dont see me ending it all! No, I dont see that. I also dont see a soul in your system because if you had one, you would AT LEAST sympathize with what some people go through since apparently youve been there before. There are different types of depression: chronic depression, bipolar disorder, and clinical depression. Everyone is prone to having mood swings, even bouts of sadness that can take months to years to overcome. But when you suffer all throughout your life with an uncontrollable downswing, staying strong isnt something that is attainable. Taking medications to level out these abnormal swings messes with your entire system. Its not black and white! You begin to live in a haze. You lose your whole sense of self worth. It NEVER makes it better, it numbs you. Its all man made crap that you are ingesting just to be able to tolerate the illness you suffer (be it a genetic disorder, or side effect from other man made crap). Nevertheless, you lose everything about yourself and continue to live a life you know was not meant for you. It cripples you. Hell, you might as well be considered as someone with a disability, because your brain is in a whole different car. In the case of Robin Williams, he had been suffering for years on end. He had depression, anxiety, and an overall general fear of life. Why the hell do you think he was so brilliant? He had an amazing gift of using humor to separate himself, as far away as he could get, from his troubles. But all of that is EXHAUSTING! Putting on a smile 24/7 as a average person, when you are dying inside, is taxing. Now imagine constantly being in the spotlight. Where you DONT get a chance to live in your genuine mood-of-the-moment out in public. No chance. If you dont want to sign an autograph -BAM- the media points you out as a jerk. I could go on and on, about how horrible it must be to not be yourself, but I wont. You just need to understand that suicide, while being tragic, is not a selfish act. Its a final plea from a troubled soul, begging for inner peace and quiet. You know what they say; to love others, you must love yourself. How can you love yourself when you dont know who you are anymore? And even though he was my favorite actor, this isnt some fangirl rant either. This is coming from someone who had lost someone very close to her due to depression leading to suicide. All of this brings up a part of my past that I try to forget. It is a demon. Stronger than your closed mind could ever imagine. Life isnt JUST about how much you loved your family and friends, its about HOW you lived. Quality of life. When you understand QUALITY, maybe then you will understand sympathy, and then hopefully youll redirect your negativity elsewhere. The funniest people have the darkest closets. ~Lana
Posted on: Tue, 12 Aug 2014 02:36:38 +0000
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