I made a promise 15 years ago to my Daddy. I promised no matter what Id never let him go to a nursing home. I meant that. But Dementia is a HORRIBLE HORRIBLE way to get old. And for the past 7 weeks I have done my best. There is no medication that will help with the psychotic episodes. And there is no way on GODS GREEN EARTH that he and my mother will ever be together again. And I tell you my heart is broken. Seeing them hold hands yesterday. I can not express the LOVE. This is why Im stepping away from everything right now. I have a horribly hard decision to make. My daughters health my health Bobbys health is all effected by this. I love my Daddy beyond words. All the wonderful trips all the Hawg Ball all the hunting trips. All the roller coasters, and the late night fishing we have done just about 5 years ago. All the fish fries I had. The HUGE one I had for his birthday at my house on the lake. Had people there that NO ONE knew. Well Mom called them, and invited them. Lol she got the wrong number. I will have all these wonderful memories for the rest of my life. But I still have to think about what is best for Daddy. And I dont know if I can fulfill all his needs at this time going into the last stage of his life. No one can help me with this decision. I appreciate all of your prayers kind words, and friendship. I did have one message last night from a dumb azz. If Shanna could have reached through the computer she said she would have. Lol my kid just as fiesty as her Momma.
Posted on: Wed, 19 Mar 2014 12:42:54 +0000
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