In chapter two of Genesis God had said that it was not good that the man should be alone, so He created woman (eventually- after bringing the other animals before Adam). God said, also in Genesis chapter two, that the two should be one flesh. In chapter three of Genesis God said that there would be a natural desire between man and woman. Since men are sinners, this desire can become unnatural. Still, there are those that God joins. Jesus said that what God hath joined together, man should not separate. When asked why Moses allowed a bill of divorce, Jesus said that it was because of the hardness of men’s hearts. What would be this ‘hardness of hearts’? Near the end of the books of Ezra and Nehemiah (both telling the same story) it was revealed that the Israelites returning from captivity to Babylon had brought a curse on the people by marrying outside of God’s will. Marrying outside of God’s will is one representation of how that natural desire between man and woman can become unnatural. So when what God has given for natural purposes is used apart from God’s natural purposes, then the users could expect to be under God’s curse. When Jesus said that we were not to separate what God had joined together, He was not saying that all that people join themselves together into is what God joins together. People can join things together that is contrary to God’s will, and this does not constitute what God joins together. Some may say that if children are born, that indicates that God made the two become one in the flesh. In the Ezra/Nehemiah account, children were born, and the cure for the curse was to separate not only the marriages, but also the children of those marriages. Many people who don’t even know God come together into marriages in the eyes of people, but this does not constitute marriage in God’s eyes, nor does it mean that God had joined them together. For those who know God (or even for those who ‘claim’ to know God) due diligence should be sought in finding God’s will for joining them as one. It is not their feelings for one another, because people’s feelings can be fickle, and based on matters that have nothing at all to do with God’s will. People of God should find that indication from God concerning what was meant to be and that firm conviction and faith and confidence that they are following God’s directives. Many people seek for God to make them and their fiancés one when they themselves are not even one within themselves. That is, the them on the inside of them is not in accord with the them on the outside of them. I think most can understand what I’m saying, but to illustrate, many may realize that there is that (whatchamacallit- spirit/essence of being/motivational life-force/etc.) within them, but many may live their life before others as a show to please others (perhaps pleasing society/social norms/etc.) even if there seems to be that inconsistency with what their ‘spirit’ seems to be true to themselves. Many are obvious- those who put on a show of being something they are not; but many may not be totally aware of this, because they have not found what they themselves truly are within themselves. If one hasn’t found his true self within himself, then the him on the inside of him is not consistent with the him on the outside of himself. So that would make him not one with himself. If he is not one with himself, then how could he be ‘one’ with someone else? So for two to become one, then there starts with two, but if one is not ‘one’ with himself, then the two are starting with three rather than two. If both he and she are not one with themselves, then that would be two and two, which would be four seeking to be ‘one’. One must become one with himself, and the other must be one with herself, before there would be two who could become the one. To say that people live outside of God’s will does not mean that there is no chance for forgiveness, and finding a remedy to the situation. If those who are married decide that they are not certain that it was God’s will, divorce should not be considered an immediate solution. In the Ezra/Nehemiah account, they had an indication of God’s will in the observance that they were under a curse, and they prayed and sought God’s will and determined what that will was. If people decide that what appears to be a curse or other indication from God that they had married outside of God’s will, that doesn’t mean the God may not join them into becoming one. But before the two could become one, they would first need to be certain that each was one with himself/herself, then pray and seek God’s guidance in the two becoming one with each other. This does not presume that God will make the two one, but it is an effort to do that prayer and seeking God’s will before something as serious as a divorce should occur. Many people live in abusive situations. Then do people feel that God’s will is to join people together for the purpose of abusing one another? Even that does not mean an immediate divorce is called for. People are human, and may be sinners, but a remedy may be sought to find the cause of the abuse and hopefully bring it to an end. At the same time, this may not happen, and then they would have to decide if a divorce may not be the better solution. This requires much prayer and seeking of God’s will. Other marriages may be based on people making decisions who are not fully understanding of what that decision call for. There is a great deal of responsibility in undertaking two people to become one. That responsibility should be expected to be shared equally. It is not simply a matter of one person working to make money for bills and the other keeping house. It is the matter of sharing the burdens of decisions in many matters, sometimes even serious legal matters. If one spouse takes too much responsibility to make it easier on the other spouse, then one could become guilty of ‘pampering’ the other spouse, by not allowing the other spouse to share in the responsibility. This would put too much burden on the one spouse, and the other spouse would have a position of being ‘pampered’ or ‘put on a pedestal’ which is contrary to God’s will which teaches that only He (God) is to be exalted, not a spouse, and this is setting one spouse into an exalted position. Too many times people who are not fully mature in their decision making capacities are deciding that they know what is best, and making decisions based on their own feelings, rather than seeking God’s will. This is a sin of presumption. It is presuming that one has enough of his own understanding to set his own will above God’s will, or in thinking that his own will is in keeping with God’s will, though God’s will was not even thoroughly searched. I am not writing this to say that I have answers, but only that too many people try to make their own answers without seeking God’s will, and then try to presume that their own answers are God’s will. Something to think about.
Posted on: Sat, 21 Sep 2013 04:23:07 +0000
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