In my early childhood, I always had both a dream and nightmare; the dream is that I was clinging to a very faint hope but it grew in course of time till my girlhood. I always dreamt that my father had amnesia caused by the car crash and we would discover one day he was alive, he didn’t pass away despite the accident, and the nightmare that my mom would die leaving me. Both have constituted the moments of horror and hope in my complicated life. Now, I discovered that my daughter Aisha is reproducing the same dreams and nightmares, as if it were a long distance echo that is reverberating again. Now, when she is playing a role of a star in TV series with her brother at home. She imagines that her father is back, he was just lost not killed by the thugs of the Egyptian police. Then she smiles when she informs her brother of her father’s return. She recalls my very old impossible dream. When she finds me taking up my medication or any injections she feels appalled that any one is sick is on the verge of death. Then she starts arguing that my grandmamy and my granddady had died at hospitals for being sick, and you may die the same way like theirs. Then I start to let her calm down, when she asks, “Mom are you gonna die coz you’re sick?”. I tell her Aisha I hate seeing you bringing and thinking about such questions, why don’t you enjoy your life and keep thinking about future aside. I hate seeing you my little princess fatherless as I was, but If we keep on recalling our hardships, I and you will be deprived of enjoying other moments of life and other gifts bestowed by Allah the Almighty I really hate seeing myself in her eyes and I hate to survive the same impossible dreams along with the same nightmares.
Posted on: Wed, 17 Sep 2014 10:10:21 +0000
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