Jamani Jamani Jamaaaaaani….!!! Leo ni siku gaaaaaani….???? Leo ni FURAAAAAAHIII DAYYY..!!! Alafu samahani a.k.a apologies a.k.a mujhe maaf kardo a.k.a ulevi ni nouma a.k.a I missed you too for being absent for 2 weeks, lakini nilikuwa na illegitimate reasons so najua mtanisamehe…!! Alafu weeki hii bana a friend of mine told me something that almost brought tears to my eyes bana… Anapata Divorce…!! Lakini msije mkaona that this was the part that brought tears to my eyes, HEEELLLLLL NO…!!!! The part that brought tears to my eyes was when he said “HE HAD A PRE-NUP..!!” Saaaaaalaaaaleh…!! A PRE-NUP is a word that lights up a Man’s eyes like the word “Gucci Handbags or Jimmy Chu” is lighting up every woman reading this eyes…!! Kudadadada zenu..!! And there is no way that Mke wangu ata agree to sign one now, and neither will any one of yours..!! However, just to understand kwamba Men like us ambaye walikosa to get their women sign one je wamepoteza kiasi gani, I went on research mode kidogo..!! At no.5 – Craig Mccaw… Settled $ 460m for a divorce..!! At no.4 – Stephen Wynn… Settled $ 740m for a divorce..!! At no.3 – Adnan Khashoggi… Settled $ 874m for a divorce..!! At no.2 – Bernie Ecclestone… Settled $ 1.2Billion for a divorce..!! At no.1 – Rupert Murdoch.. Settled $ 1.7Billion for a divorce..!! Na ninajua wanawake watukuwa wanasema kwamba, “Mmmmh, amepata hela nyingi huyo kweli kweli…!!” but here is the catch…!! Hao watu wote ambaye who ‘gave the money got the divorce’ got married again, but wanawake hawakuweza ku get married again… mnajua kwa nini..?? Because All Men know one thing – “If a guy EVER pays money to a woman to GET AWAY from him, basi lazima kuna some serious issues with that woman..!!” kudaadadadadeki…!! Yaaani wewe mwisho lini mmewai kumwona Jamaa eti anamlipa Demu kwa kumwacha eti??? Salaaaaaleh…!! Alafu eti mmlipe $1 Billion + Dolla kumfukuza…!! For that amount yaani lazima kuna something wrong in combination of Amy Whine House, Percy Jackson, Katie Holmes na with a topping of TINA TURNER kudadadaeki pale…!!! Sasa before wanawake waaanze kunitafuta leo usiku, and some MEN who will have an irresistible urge to try to protect the honor of all women by writing on this post of their “Pro-Women” views… (Hao ni most likely wale Ma Supa Terrazo as they say..!!) Let me say this much in defense of “some sane women” – kuna Demu mmoja, Marie Corelli – alikuwa author wazamani vile na alikuwa Demu ambaye alikuwa ame ‘been around the block’ as they say but never got married and when she was asked she said… “I never married because there was no need. I have 3 pets at home which answer the same purpose as a Husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night…!!” Sasa in line with her theory, leo usiku itabidi wananume sisi wote tujifanye ma Puuuuus cats (Malizia mwenyewe hiyo) na tuseme “It’s time to go Correelllzzzzzyyy…!!!”
Posted on: Fri, 21 Jun 2013 05:47:08 +0000
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