The Real Chris Brown Story: Chris was Charlie Browns adopted cousin. While Charlie was missing the extra point, Chris was practicing dance moves with Snoopy and Woodstock. After the Browns put Chris through preparatory school, he revealed that he wanted to be a dancer and dropped out of pre-med. He changed his name to Paulfromdawall Breakindaballs Mccall. He soon encountered a disciple of Elijah Muhammad, who explained to him that Mccall was a white Irish pig slave name and the white man wanted nothing but to exploit Chriss amazing rhythmic abilities for a profit. The Muhammadist explained that Chriss given name of Brown was way better because both Jim Brown and James Brown were two black men who had done their best to piss off the white establishment (Jim Brown with Raquel Welsh James for making white kids dance better than Elvis with their hips). So Chris changed his goal to become the best performer superstar he could while at the same time pissing off the white establishment. So he made music that would make the young adolescent and post adolescent white girl shake their ass and listen to over and over while they got drunk and soiled in their first home outside of Mommy and Daddys house. He ran into trouble though in the form of Rhianna. Because he had grown up with Lucy, Marcy, and Peppermint Patty, Chris just wasnt used to communicating with black women. So when Rhianna didnt bow to his whim like the spineless myth chasing white groupies he had in high school, Chris went crazy and beat the dog shit out of her. So Brown succeeded in pissing off the establishment both white and black, while at the same time becoming one of these new entertainers who is above even the athlete as we see with Ray Rice. Chris and R Kelly have entered the realm of the untouchable. They can do whatever they want and stay on the radio. I hope that helps explain it.
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 16:10:02 +0000
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