There was only 4 likes but o well here ya go guys hope ya like it :) I watched as the crimson liquid fell from my wrists onto the white tiled floor. I am done with life. No one loves me, everyone laughs at me. My hair wasn’t good enough. My lips, my eyes, my nose, my ears, everything, I wasn’t good enough for them. I tried everything I could afford. I changed everything about me, but that just made them laugh more. So I wrote them a letter, hate mail of a sort. It said I was going to kill myself, and come back as a ghost and kill them. I was going to make them as miserable as me. It was going to work… until I heard the ambulance through the dull throbbing in my head. I was on the floor and I hadn’t noticed. My parents ran into the bathroom and my mother screamed. She made my ears ring vigorously. The paramedics came in and took me away to the hospital. It wasn’t too long after I got to the hospital that I realized my plans had failed. Everything I worked so hard to plan had been ruined. I just couldn’t believe it, they did this to me. I started to scream and thrash around. This was worse than killing myself because they had been the ones to ruin it, just like everything else I worked so hard to do. I finally realized I could have changed this outcome. I didn’t have to send them those letters till the day I was going to kill myself. The day I had specifically picked for my suicide. I had been planning this death out for the past two years (only because I couldn’t get the courage to do it). When I got the courage I sent the letters two days in advance telling them exactly what day and what time I was going to kill myself. The day I tried suicide was the day they killed my older brother Leonardo. January sixteenth, it also happened to be his birthday. He died in the middle of winter because of my enemies’ siblings torturing him. I learned to get over his death, but I could not forgive them. I was only ten when I lost my brother. He had barely turned sixteen that year. My mom never was the same. Then I turned sixteen and I was going to kill myself on his birthday. I wanted to die at the same age as my brother did. But they stopped me. I know it’s because they didn’t want to be haunted, but it was so hard knowing that they caused my plans to crash. I just wanted one thing from them, to let me die. “Honey, you are going to be taken to a place for a while, till you get better…,” my mom whispered her voice cracking as tears streamed down her face. “I know where I’m going mom. It’s called an insane asylum. I also know I’m never going to leave it either,” I watched as she cried harder her baby blue eyes rimmed with bright crimson red, the color I so dearly loved. “Lucy! Leave your poor mother alone it’s bad enough we have to send you don’t be so heartless!” my father yelled at me, in the middle of the hospital, his jade green eyes getting darker. “Don’t patronize me father. I know you’re just pissed because I ruined your perfect white bathroom and you have to spend unwanted money on me.” He slapped me, leaving a crimson red handprint across my face. I just smiled, they had turned me sadistic. I was never going to be a normal teenage girl. That’s when the police got involved. They pulled me away from my crying and screaming mother and my stock still father. I didn’t fight them; I went willingly because I knew it was the best for me. I couldn’t believe that they did this to me and didn’t care. For two months I was under room arrest I guess you could call it. I was not under any circumstances able to see, speak or do anything with other people. It irritated the piss out of me, but I didn’t let it show. I was sadistic and I knew it by the time I got to that place. The “Sunny Day’s For Your Troubled Teens” aka SDFYTT. I laughed on the inside when I learned this name. It was anything but a sunny place. The windows in our rooms were barred and blacked out so we were always in darkness. The bathrooms were kept sparkling clean except for the fact that you couldn’t see it. The windows there were also barred and half assed blacked out. When I was finally able to go out and meet the people I realized that I didn’t belong here. I wasn’t as crazy or hateful. I was just scared and sad. I just had suicidal tendencies so I couldn’t leave. When I went to go to my room I was told that I was being moved to a room with someone else because the room I was using was for newbie’s and Sysco’s. The room I was moved into was full of torn stuffed animals. It was unreal. I asked who I was rooming with and they didn’t say a word. That’s when a girl about a year older than me popped out from under a pile of fluff and teddy bear heads. She gave me a warm smile and pointed to another pile of fluff with the bodies of the teddy bears. I was guessing that was my bed. I tensely walked over with the white suits watching me. I poked my hand in the fluff. I winced when I felt something sharp stab deep into my hand but I didn’t say anything. I smiled and nodded. They heaved a sigh of relief and closed the door. I pulled my hand out and started sucking on the wound. I guess my death was inevitable if this girl was used to being alone. “Here,” she came over and grabbed my hand wrapping it with a cloth of some sort. “Sorry about that… I have been roomed with too many snitches… I had to do something to make sure you weren’t.” “Well don’t worry about me then I don’t snitch. I know what it’s like to deal with snitches. Either they are there when you don’t want them to be, or they aren’t there when you need them to be.” “I know how that is. My names Lacy, what’s yours?” My roomie said. “I’m Lucy, nice to meet you. Thanks for the bandage by the way.” “No problem, hey, could you help me clean the mess? The inspectors should be here soon and we both will get in trouble cause of my mess.” Lacy gave me an apologetic look. “Sure it’s not like we have anything better to do.” I laughed and Lacy smiled. We got the stuffed animal mess cleaned up and then fought with the bed spring that Lacy had pulled out. Right as we got the bed spring back in place the inspectors came in. One was tall dark and mysterious, the other was short stocky and scary. The look they gave me was perverted and not appreciated. I looked over at Lacy and she had a lazy seductive smile on her face, but behind those pale blue eyes I saw genuine fear. That’s when I knew getting moved to a room with a roommate might not be as good as I first had thought it would be. “Ladies thank you for the clean room, next inspection in one hour.” The taller and darker man said. The shorter one gave me a look then walked off with his partner. When the door was empty of inspectors Lacy finally relaxed. I looked at her, but didn’t ask. “If they aren’t coming back for another hour I have time to explain the severity of their punishments if you don’t have a clean room.” Lacy began, “If your room is not to their liking they will pull you aside and either beat you or rape you.” “Wait what???” I asked. “They aren’t supposed to but it’s happened a lot here they mainly just rape the girls and beat the boys.” “That’s not okay… a lot of these kids are already screwed up in the head….” “I know I’m one of them… I’m here cause I tried to kill my pregnant step mother.” “Really? Why did you want her dead?” I asked out of curiosity. “Well your parents must not be divorced.” She shrugged, “I didn’t want a new mom or even a new sibling in my life, what else was there to do.” “I see what you mean; I’m here because I tried to kill myself.” I showed her my scars on my wrist and she nodded. “I wanted to die on the day my brother got murdered and my god damn parents ruined it once again, just like they ruined my brother.” Lacy gave me a long look and then hugged me. “I hope you don’t stay here as long as I have.”
Posted on: Thu, 25 Jul 2013 21:42:44 +0000
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