There’s an understanding that at some point in my relating with this new man, one of us will trigger pain in the other. That pain may lead to withdrawal. And that’s ok. Withdrawal is ok. Space is ok. Separateness is ok. Being triggered is even ok. Why? Because being in Love, allowing ourselves to be seen and to be vulnerable, will always result in us being emotionally triggered. By their very nature, relationships bring to the surface old wounds, old ideas, old beliefs and old patterns so they can be seen and released. This is the work of Love. This is the work of relationship. Not the Romantic Bubble I believed in 13 years ago. Yes, there are things about me that will trigger pain and hurt in the man who loves me. I know that this is no fault of mine, nor flaw of mine. When that happens, as it will, I can stand back and trust that the man who loves me is strong enough to face his own fear squarely. Just as I will face the fear that he triggers in me. Each of us owning what belongs to ourselves—not dumping it on the other, or blaming the other for triggering it.
Posted on: Tue, 24 Jun 2014 03:38:59 +0000
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