Tomorrow makes one year that my brother Stephano Solo Gonzales took his life. Getting that call that morning was the most horrific thing I have ever experienced in my life. When I heard the words come out of my sisters mouth my legs gave and I collapsed to the ground! I never believed that he would actually do something like this! We immediately rushed to his home. I had no idea what we as a family were about to be exposed to! My brothers lifeless body was in his garage and we all had to watch the coroner wheel his body out of the house wrapped in a white sheet. We screamed, howled cried tears of pain that none of us have ever felt before. I think life stopped for us all at the moment. It was so unreal I have blocked that morning completely out until today. The other day on Friday morning one of the mothers at my daughters school asked me how do you recover from a suicide death as a family? I said well we started our foundation NEVER BE SOLO. We have dedicated our lives to spreading awareness about suicide so no other family will ignore the signs that ARE present. Not everyone that suffers from mental illness, depression etc. displays their pain the way the pharmaceutical commercials make you think. My brother was extremely handsome. He had a ton of friends and was always the life of any party. On many occasions showed deeper and darker signs but when someone has such highs and comes off so loving you never would believe that it could come to this! Now here we are 1 year later and I dread writing every post but its the only way I can heal! I share our experience so we can learn from my brother suffering. I could ignore it and act like it never happened but it did and it wouldnt be right if I couldnt help someone else. Since weve started Never Be Solo I have heard so many sad stories. I have been thanked for sharing and being so open. People have shared their deepest darkest secrets with us and its overwhelming but that is what NEVER BE SOLO is for...Being there for someone that is suffering when they feel absolutely alone. Some people that know my brother personally think that NEVER BE SOLO means dont be Stephano because they dont understand that SOLO means ALONE! What I am saying is DONT BE ALONE and Dont end up like my brother because Suicide is forever FINAL! He will not come back and now we are left in such much pain! Seeing our mother suffer the way she does is so hard. Getting calls at 4am in the morning from your siblings crying their eyes out because they cant believe he is gone is something we pray no other person has to deal with. Please take a moment and watch what DEPRESSION truly looks like in the tribute attached. These are videos from the last months of my brothers life. After watching you would never believer that 1 year later we would be honoring his life at his gravesite. NEVER BE SOLO REMEBER TO LOVE YOURSELF FIRST
Posted on: Mon, 13 Oct 2014 04:30:49 +0000
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