UN unveils capitalism opt-out region 07-10-13 THE UN has given people who don’t like capitalism the option to try something else instead. Better than a job, at least when it’s sunny Anyone making the decision not to bother with the earning money thing will be given basic food and shelter but won’t be allowed to wear branded jeans or watch telly with adverts in. An area the size of Wales, sited in the area formerly known as Wales, has been cleared and will become home for the millions expected to opt out of the work-consume-die cycle. Network engineer Tom Booker said: “It was after the hugely expensive holiday that didn’t begin to heal the stress of working for it all year that I decided to leave the system. “You have to hand in your iPod and you get these grey robes and food and drink with generic stickers on, like they used to have in the Big Brother house. “We all have to help make dinner and tidy up, but apart from that we just hang out and talk about how we hated having jobs.” A spokesman for the United Nations Human Right Council said: “Ordinary people had a real lack of lifestyle choices. Capitalism was a monopoly, and as we all know monopolies are inherently damaging to the free market. “We’ve currently got people working on a new political system, based on anarcho-syndicalism but with a much larger youth appeal, but that’s still with marketing.” Up to 79 per cent of the global workforce is expected to opt out, though the UN faces a legal challenge from leading capitalists who are belatedly realising that perhaps they shouldn’t have been so obnoxious.
Posted on: Mon, 07 Oct 2013 10:41:59 +0000
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