When we ask for appraisal this is what happens...... Must Read it..... The Art of Appraisal Big Boss: This year your performance was good, excellent and outstanding. So, your rating is average. Kumar: What? How come average? Big Boss: Because...err. ..uhh...you lack domain knowledge. Kumar: But last year you said I am a domain expert and you put me in this project as a domain consultant. Big Boss: Oh is it? Well, in that case, I think your domain knowledge has eroded this year. Kumar: What??? Big Boss: Yes, I didnt see you sharing knowledge on Purchasing domain. Kumar: Why would I? Because I am not in Purchasing, I am in Manufacturing. Big Boss: This is what I dont like about you. You give excuse for everything. Kumar: Huh? *Confused* Big Boss: Next, you need to improve your communication skills. Kumar: Like what? I am the one who trained the team on Business Communication”, you sat in the audience and took notes, you remember? Big Boss: Oh is it? Errr...well. .I mean, you need to improve your Social Pragmatic Affirmative Communication. Kumar: Huh? What the hell is that? *Confused* Big Boss: See! Thats why you need to learn about it. Kumar: *head spinning* Big Boss: Next, you need to sharpen your recruiting skills. All the guys you recruited left within 2 months. Kumar: Well, not my mistake. You told them you will sit beside them and review their code, and most resigned the next day itself. Couple of them even attempted suicide. Big Boss:*stunned* (recovers from shock) Err...anyway, I tried to give you a better rating, but our Normalization process gave you only average. Kumar: Last year that process gave me excellent. This year just average? Why is this process pushing me up and down every year? Big Boss: Thats a complicated process. You dont want to hear. Kumar: Ill try to understand. Go ahead. Big Boss: Well, we gather in a large room, write down the names of sub-ordinates in bits of paper, and throw them up in the air. Whichever lands on the floor gets average, whichever lands on table gets good, whichever we manage to catch gets excellent and whichever gets stuck to ceiling gets outstanding . Kumar: (eyes popping out) What? Ridiculous! So who gets poor rating? Big Boss: Those are the ones we forget to write down. Kumar: What the hell! And how can paper bits stick to ceiling for outstanding ? Big Boss: Oh no, now you have started questioning our 20 year old organizational process! Kumar: *faints*
Posted on: Tue, 26 Nov 2013 11:55:52 +0000
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