You Know You have Lived in Egypt too long When........ * You accept Inshallah as a flight-confirmation. * You never eat before 22:00 clock at night. * You wear a sweater in 26 degrees. * You see a no problem as a clear sign that you still have to check several times. * You think a speed limit and no entry signs and red lights are optional. * You think carpets should be hanging on walls. * You can give complete directions without a street name. * Your telephone and satellite cable comes in from the balcony. * You hoard a considerable stock of household candles and drinking water. * Every Taxi driver knows where you live when you are too drunk to remember it yourself. * Your water is cut off you don’t complain you just put on more deodorant and go to the pub. * A workman comes to fix something you have to lend him the tools and then show him what to do with them. * You are not surprised to see a goat/ in a passenger seat/back of the car. * You consider it normal for the same section of the road to be dug up 3 times by contractors in the space of a few weeks. * You get used to using the cold water tap to get hot water during the summer (and when your electricity socket flashes blue whenever you put in a plug). * You think that a box of Kleenex belongs on every dinner table (and in every car). * You understand that when someone says Bukra (tomorrow), InshaAllah to you it really means Sometime during this calendar year...if you are lucky! * 5 people turn up to change a tap washer, but they havent got a tap, and the only tool they have is a hammer and they want you to give them lunch before they start. * You dont think anything of phoning the chemist to send you some antibiotics that you have prescribed to yourself, and not via doctor. * You expect to have a fight with a taxi driver about the fare and you are surprised if you dont. * Driving at 180 kph seems almost too slow * A Biro or pen or piece of cotton wool are effective methods for fixing most household problems * Its normal to give someone a missed call as a way of saying hello, instead of actually picking up the phone, dialing and saying hello * Its normal to leave the car engine running and smoking a cigarette whilst filling up your car * Hearing 4 year old children still out and running around at midnight on a school day is normal. * Shoes are optional. * Not getting a shock when touching anything electrical is a pleasant surprise. * Shouting at each other is a normal way of communicating. * You answer the phone by just saying ello? ello? repeatedly. * You find the early morning call to prayer from the 200 decibel speakers from the mosque down the road strangely soothing. Welcome to Egypt
Posted on: Sat, 05 Jul 2014 10:40:54 +0000
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