(A gay couple has just met up in the restaurant and kissed each other upon arrival. Another customer has seen this and is obviously angry.) Angry Customer: “Damn f**s.” Gay Man: “Excuse me?” Angry Customer: “You heard me, you little s***. Let’s not make this into some little pride protest, okay? I have to accept that you’re going to live your lifestyle, and you have to accept that I’ve got freedom of speech.” Gay Man: *quietly* “Is it too much to ask for a little human decency?” Angry Customer: “Human? Listen up, what you’re doing is not human. I think I have the right to determine what I think is human.” (The manager shows up. He’s a quiet Italian man who I assume is conservative due to the Christian imagery and portrait of Reagan he keeps around the restaurant.) Angry Customer: *to the owner* “Hey, can you move either them or us to another table?” (Instead of responding to the angry customer, the owner instead speaks to his wife.) Owner: “I’m sorry ma’am, but we have a strict ‘no pets’ policy in my restaurant.” Wife: “Uh, I, uh, what? I don’t have a—” Owner: “Well, according to your talking monkey over here, I can determine who’s a human and who’s not. You bring an animal into my restaurant; I gotta assume it’s your pet.” (The angry customer storms out. When I left, the owner was giving his description, and copies of security camera footage, to the biggest crowd of police I’ve seen. Apparently it’s a bad idea to not pay your bill at a restaurant that gives free coffee to cops.)
Posted on: Mon, 02 Sep 2013 04:31:18 +0000
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