This is for the few close ppl once in my life that were around during a period of Love^Lies^Devotion and Deception.... I ask Does any1 I truly knew back in the day even know me anymore? Im not the 19 yr old runaround ruff neck, or the 23yr old new daddy workAholic that wasnt there, nor the 30 yr old newlywed... Im the 40 yr old man whos seen it all, and done it all and doesnt want to be questioned at all... So for sum1 2 post on my FB wall first know the justification or reasoning behind any post any1 on FB puts up. Some use FB for Drama others use it as a outsource of getting things off the mind and chest, some use it to tell whats happened in a day, others are what was taught in school while others have an Epiphany. Point is dont judge if you dont like what I have to say perse dont comment just leave it be.... Remember this is solely for the ones who were around during a certain time period in my life. I just implore where ARE YOU KNOW? Ive tried to figure out what love is and why due I love so strong a individual that left years ago thats married or one that abused the holly world out of me from mental to physical. Why is it so hard to totally let go? We all be here any1 thats truly loved sum1. Maybe its the external scars I see everyday or maybe something deeper you need to feel and understand. Im going on 6.5 5 years now since officially getting divorced loosing the #1 person who I thought was the 1 in 21 and 1. Love alters your life, in turn alters your mind. The mind is complex Enuff unless your a nuero scientist you cant just shut it off like water. The pain stops at long intervals there are new people who come and most go whats evident is the GAP of that loss never truly closes. There is a reason I said Id be happy alone maybe It wasnt because I thought I would be truly happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. Its just easier to be alone you dont hurt as if wen your with some1. The one thing no1 seems to understand I could live a thousand lifetimes and never feel with someone else the way It felt with that #1 person. It was this terrifying heart wrenching kind of feeling that makes u feel like your losing your mind. One minute U hate them, the next u cant handle being away from them.... Mad, passionate, extraordinarily crazy love. I have very little memory of physical pain, but can summon up almost the entire gamut of emotional pain years after the event an experience Id like to stop having..... Ill finish off by saying sum of my so called caring friends dont know whats truly going on because you havent been here for me you all left #YOUALL!!!!! ask yourselves that before I get chastised on FB: The most painful thing in life is losing the one you value, the truth is, the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of valuing someone so much and forgetting that you were once sum1 thats my issue...... youtu.be/Xp7_eM2GuQI Sent from Lupos IPHONE6
Posted on: Tue, 28 Oct 2014 12:19:34 +0000
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