I met so many amazing people so far this weekend. I think I know why I get depressed and reclusive. Every day I just talk and interact with people that know nothing about nothing. It blows my mind when I say that my halloween costume was Julian Assange and the person tells me that they dont know who that is. Anyone that knows me knows that I love nothing more than to just talk a mile a minute about science, philosophy, cybernetics and things like brain to machine interfaces. Never in my life had I ever met someone that was on the same level as me on those type of issues and seriously not only knows what Im talking about but heavily researches it and knows things about it I dont know. Even things that this person had not heard of he absorbed it like a sponge and even with little to no knowledge on the subject can still put forward poignant ideas about it. Ive never suggested a book to someone and had them find a sharpie and write it on their arm with the intent to go find the book and read it. It wouldnt suprise me if the next time we hang out this person has read this book and wants to discuss it. That made me so happy. I recommend so many amazing fiction/nonfiction books, documentaries, music, movies, comic books, articles, research papers, philosophers and I feel like it all falls on deaf ears. Like, I will lend you a book and people wont read it. I recommend the comic books Planetary to almost everyone I meet and I honestly feel like not a single person Ive recommended it has ever read it. I personally have read it cover to cover 6-7 times and issues here and there many more. I digress. but it was amazing. It never occurred to me that that could be an issue for me. This just makes one of my goals I need to do asap is become a card carrying member of MENSA and hang out with other mensa people. It felt like at least 30 if not more people that I all met at this house would be candidates for mensa. It was bloody brilliant. The most profound spiritual experience of my entire life. I feel like I released all this pent up negativity that I kept inside of me just from never finding someone that TRULY gets me. This is 2013. Im tired of being looked at for being weird everytime I bring up the fact that I want to create cyborgs and bring people back from the dead and live forever in a super computer or nanomachine body. This should be what literally everyone is talking in this information age. Ever since Ive gotten out of the hospital 2 weeks ago my life has been having amazing weekends and then soul crushing depression all week long where I just sleep all day to live in my lucid dream land that I can just manipulate to w/e I want. I was wanting to just rather live in my world in my head where I can be anything I want and do anything I want to do. Then get up drink an entire pot of coffee to just survive and not want to lay around all day. Then wait to get tired to go back to my dreamworld. Then every weekend I have an amazing weekend and meet awesome people and slip back into the depression during the week. I think Ive just figured out that I am not stimulated nearly as much as I need to be. Which is what has me so excited to go back to college. I cant wait. Just to go in a little further detail what this day of mine was like. I met this guy as he came in the door. We both entered altered states of mind and then talked nearly non stop for a day while doing things like, Dancing to music, stretching, yoga postures, laying on a bed, sitting on a floor, grocery shopping, while cooking an entire house of people a 50 dollar breakfast. I really want to rewatch Cloud Atlas now.
Posted on: Sun, 24 Nov 2013 05:08:50 +0000