#School Days – EPISODE 6 ********************************** ‘Good morning class’ the lady greeted once more and we all mumured in response. ‘Some of you know me and some of you don’t but just so you know, my name is Aunty Ebere and am your new english teacher, any questions?’ Aunty Ebere spoke with so much authority that I guess made even those who were lousy keep shot and not dare ask any question. I personally didn’t get why she sounded so harsh, was ‘JSS1 B’ a known notorious class that made her think she needed to be firm in other to be able to handle us? I thought to myself. ‘Since there are no questions, let’s get down to business’ she paused to have a last look at the class before she walked down to the teachers table to drop her bag and then she did a rather funny and unexpected thing. She opened the hand bag and brought out a pair of hand gloves which she properly wore and then asked; ‘Who is the class captain?’ The whole class was rather surprised by the ‘hand glove’ act, including the class captain, so she got no reply at first until she asked again; ‘Are you all deaf? I said who is the class captain?!’ This time, a rather petite boy stood up and said; ‘am the class captain ma’ ‘What’s your name?’ She asked. ‘Amadi Chibuzor’ I felt the urge to laugh because of his surname and what most of you who have watched a few Nollywood movies which had an Igbo Village settings would understand what I mean *winks*, if you haven’t then you must have watched ‘Dance of shame’. Amadi the palm… Okay, I think I’ve given you more than enough clue *laughs*. ‘Am I going to write on the black board with my nose or what?’ She asked sarcastically. ‘Folusho, go and give aunty chalk na’ Chibuzor ordered another student. ‘Why should be be the one to give me chalk?’ Aunty Ebere asked. ‘He is the chalk/board captain ma’ Chibuzor replied. ‘Chalk captain? Like seriously?’ Aunty Ebere asked surprised but rhetorically. I was also surprised by this new development, I’ve heard of class captain and assistant class captain, but chalk captain? What tha fvck does that even mean? I thought within myself as my lips curved into a smile. Anyway, the Folusho guy, stood up and offered the teacher a box of chalk which magically appeared out of his school bag. Aunty Ebere then went ahead to write ‘FIGURES OF SPEECH’. She turned to face the class and thus, started teaching; ‘Today we are going to treat a new topic, how many of you are familiar with the topic written on the…’ And that was how she kept on talking about nouns, pronoun bla bla bla until I felt so dizzy that I didn’t even know when I slept off. That was a really wrong move because experience thought me nobody dares sleep in Aunty Ebere class. A heavy knock on the head woke me up from sleep, before opening my eyes, I made a silent promise to forcefully remove the hand of the person that knocked me so harshly with no mercy only for me to raise my head up and see Aunty Ebere towering over me with a devilish smirk written all over her face. I instantly knew I wasn’t going to remove anybody’s hand, at least not any time soon. ‘Where do you think you are?’ She asked me. I almost said; ‘Which kind silly question be that? No be school be this? Abi you blind?’ But I dared not unless I wanted to sleep in the school clinic. But I didn’t know what else to reply her so I starred at her blankly. ‘Do you think you are in your father’s house?!’ She asked with her voice raised. ‘Err..err…’ I stuttered as I tried to think of a suitable reply to the seemingly rhetorical question. ‘Err what?!’ She screamed at me in such a manner that the whole class was startled. ‘Err.. No ma, I don’t think its my father’s house’ I finally replied visibly shaking. She didn’t bother making another statement but she rather gave me that kind of slap that made my head turn 180 degrees and I can swear the joints on my neck shifted from its rightful position. ‘Ahh!!!’ I screamed out in pain. ‘Go and kneel down in the quadrangle where I can clearly see you from here’ The assistant class captain was touched and she attempted to save me by saying; ‘aunty, he is a new student’. ‘So? Is there a law which states new students should sleep during my class? In fact, let me warn you all now. No one should dare sleep or make noise in my class!’ Aunty Ebere fired back almost immediately. I didn’t dare grumble, I simply ran out of the class to the quadrangle and knelt down, I even voluntarily raised up my hands and closed my eyes, the whole class busted out in laughter by this act. I couldn’t get why they they laughed but couldn’t ask. The rest of the day went on relatively bad for me because even after her class she dragged me to the staff room and reported me to the entire staff rooms and you know how we men can do over sabi just to impress a lady. One big headed male staff voluntarily decided to beat me for no really just reason, asin, why would you beat a student merely because he slept off during a boring class? It wasn’t entirely my fault na, after all, Aunty Ebere was boring too, did anybody beat her? Was the questions and thoughts than ran through my head as ‘Mrs oversabi’ whipped me like I had stolen his lunch. I went to hostel later on that day crying, not because of the beating or punishment but because I had already missed lunch. When I got to hostel, it was quite empty as almost everybody were still at the dining hall, I sat on my bed and thought about how my day went. I firstly recalled the events of ‘Senior Jerry’, ‘Aunty Ebere’ and then ‘Mr Voluntary flogger’, out of nowhere I found my eyes getting moist. ‘If am at home now, who would tell me to knell down under the hot sun? Or why the hell would I have to wake up by 4am and the first thing that would be done to me is be beaten by a so called senior Jerry and friends’ were the questions that flooded my mind as the tears increased. You know that time you cry for so long that you have no more tears to cry out and then you develop a chronic headache? That was my exact situation when a tap on my shoulder brought me out of my intense crying session. I looked up at the person standing in front of me only to see Stanley with a worrisome look planted on his face. ‘Who beat you?’ Was the first question he asked. ‘Ermm.. Err.. Nobody’ I replied partially truthfully. ‘Talk jhur!’ He urged me. “Err.. Am serious, nobody beat am, I’m just missing home’ I replied and suddenly found renewed strength to cry out more vigorously than before. Stanley suddenly bursted out in laughter for reasons I knew nothing about. The funny thing was, Stanley has this kind of infectious laughter, asin, when he laughs you would suddenly feel the urge to laugh too even if you have no reason to, so slowly, I stopped crying and my lips first curved into a smile and before I could say Jack Robinson, I started chuckling. ‘So you dey try tell me say you dey laugh because you dey home-sick?’ Stanley asked speaking pigin english with his flawless ‘Warri’ accent still laughing. ‘Err.. Errmm, its not just that jhur, I’m also hungry’ I replied in my consistent flawless english. ‘Oh! You no get zape?’ He asked. ‘I get but everything dey my guardian house’ I replied, finally joining him in speaking pigin. ‘Oh! Okay, carry your cup follow me, come take garri’ he replied and walked to his corner. I didn’t need to be told twice before I speedily followed him with immediate effect. He not only gave me garri, but gracefully gave me sugar and when it got to the milk, he just said; ‘no vex, but, I no dey share my milk’ I just smiled, thanked him and walked back to my corner grinning widely. Just as I added water to the zape and was about taking my first spoon a senior walked into the room and scream ‘Last boy!’ On top of his voice. I was already accustomed to what ‘Last boy’ but I knew I would definitely be the last boy if I even attempted running for it because I would have to drop my zape in my locker first so that it won’t ‘grow legs’ (I hope you know what I mean), so I sat down on my bed and waited for the worse to happen. The senior sighted me from where he stood and slowly walked towards me then said; ‘So you are now my mate shey? Abi you don’t use to hear in the afternoon’ ‘I err.. Err.. Ermmm’ I stuttered not really knowing what to say(what could I even possibly say na?) He landed a back handed slap on my cheek that was approximately twice that of Aunty Ebere’s, I lost my balance and the zape I had been protecting with my life fell off and poured. He didn’t seem to be bothered by that as he just said; ‘Follow me!’ His facial impression was all I need to know that he didn’t need to repeat his self. I looked at myself and stood up then followed him with my subconscious wondering what the worse that could possibly happen. The funny part of it all was, this was kind of still my first day. ***************** Watch0ut For Episode 7
Posted on: Thu, 30 Oct 2014 20:08:32 +0000
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